The masquerade

I am intrigued by the trouble people endure in order to hide from what is real. This often pops up when groups of people are together. There is a certain expected level of conduct or speech or ideas, and most people go to great lengths to ensure that their comments and actions fall within that expected range. If people act or say things outside of those boundaries, the tendency is for them to be ostracized, often subconsciously. They will probably find themselves pushed to the margins and left sitting by themselves instead of actively engaged in discourse with others. I know that when I was the one concerned with meeting that accepted level of action, it felt like it was only natural and right to do that. I think the masquerade is so effective that you don't even know you are participating in it. Since I've abandoned, at least partially, that game, I know what it's like to be the outsider, to be marginalized and omitted from discussions and activity. It doesn't make me proud of myself for the past or proud of my friends.

In that context when you find someone willing to acknowledge the messiness of the real, you value it. The willingness to engage people and reality where they are, shows a heart that is more concerned with the people involved than with the level of action. I want to be more like that.

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